What a dweeb

Is "dweeb" still a recognized word? In any case, I am the definition. Thomas was out of town all last week, and I was unable to call on him to rescue me from the big bad bugs that have mutated around here due to the drought. Anyone who knows me very well or for any length of time, knows that bugs and I DO NOT coexist peaceably. I was terrorized last week by a mutant wasp from Hell and a spider the size of Alaska.
The wasp was HUGE, would not die despite 9 whacks with the broom (by me, screaming and running all over the place) and a manual squishing by my motherinlaw (who thought it all vastly amusing!) over a 48 hour period. We (I should say Dolores, really) managed to flush him despite our surprise of him coming back to life when he hit the water and trying to fly out of the toilet. I was a wreck, and my kids were alternately horrified and amused.
The next night I sat down at the computer after getting the kids to bed thinking I would enjoy a long, lazy "searchfest" for cheap sewing patterns. When what to me wandering eyes should appear but a spider of an alien class the size of 3 or 4 quarters stuck together. It was 9:30. I had no more "courage" after the protracted bout with the wasp. I was alone, and my motherinlaw won't drive in the dark; so being the total DWEEB (see above) I called my unfortunate neighbor (who was asleep by the way) and asked her if she'd send her husband over to kill a spider for me. Again, much amusement, but more importantly, a "yes".
Poor Tommy came over and in all the excitement of the door opening and closing, the kids and I lost sight of the spider's exact location. So he had to hunt around and finally found it on the computer table right next to the printer. What a lovely present that would have been. I was hugely embarrassed and sorry the house was such a wreck etc. etc. But most of all I was just supremely thankful he didn't mind.
And there, another chapter in the book of "Carrie and the Bugs" is set down. Right after the one about Dawn doing my high school bug collection for me :)